Day 182 – remembering Krishna

I am still sick. I spent most of the night tossing and turning from the strength of the fever. My whole body is aching and I have to go and teach yoga. Nobody can cover this class for me as all the other teachers are in the same workshop. I manage to pull myself together for the class and for a moment feel like maybe I could work tonight. But, no, quite lucky I already called in sick because I really do need another day in bed. I have barely slept and I am exhausted and weak. As I teach, I feel a moment of dizziness and I am scared that I am about to faint. Luckily the class is already in Savasana and I can steady myself against a wall and slowly sit down. The soft music suddenly drifts through my fuzzy brain and I hear Wah! singingĀ Hare Krishna. Suddenly I am filled with this beautiful sensation of light and love. It is like Krishna has appeared to say, “hey, remember me? All you have to do is chant my name and I will be there for you.” I repeat his holy mantra in my head until the feeling of dizziness passes and before bringing the students out of their conscious relaxation, I bow my head to the floor, offering gratitude to Jai Krishna. Did I forget you? You, who was so present for me in India. You, whose home I prayed in. You, whose name first appeared to me before I even knew what yoga was. You, who danced on the head of the serpent in the Yamuna river. You, who has come to me now as I sit weakly pushing myself further than I should. Shall I put all my faith and trust in your grace and allow your name, your sacred mantra to heal me from within? Yes! The answer is always Yes.

Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna. Krishna Krishna, Hare Hare. Hare Rama, Hare Rama. Rama Rama, Hare Hare.

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