Day 195 – conscious decisions

I don’t just love chocolate, I am severely addicted to it. Having the flu has forced me to cut back on my consumption. The cough that has lingered has come back with a vengeance and I spend most of the day coughing and spluttering. I walk past my favourite cafe and stare longingly at the liquid chocolate fountain. Just one tiny cup of that molten deliciousness couldn’t really be that bad, could it? I am practically salivating but then I feel the rattle in my throat and I bend over in a coughing fit. This is that moment where my lower mind and higher mind meet and discuss my body. The lower mind is stomping her feet and screaming, her only argument is, “But I waaaaant it!” and the higher mind looks on calmly, with compassion and tender love. The body is busy still coughing and eventually the higher mind just wraps her arms around me. With love and devotion to the body as the vessel, as the home in this world, as the greatest miracle to sustain life, I comfort myself and say it is for the best to just walk away. Sometimes the conscious decision is to say yes and have chocolate for breakfast. Sometimes the conscious decision is to say no and walk away. The higher self always knows the answer, we just have to look past the screaming tantrum throwing lower mind to be able to hear the truth. This may seem like a fairly simple decision to make, but it is often one of the hardest when it comes to food. I succumb so easily to the temptations of the temporal. Once swallowed, the pleasure is over and the body is left to clear up the mess. Even when I consume healthy, whole foods, the digestive system has to work hard to get it all sorted, absorb the necessary, separate it from the rest and then get it out again. If we could pull back the layers and watch the whole thing happen, I would probably hold back on so much more food. I look at the chocolate fountain as I walk away and a horrible taste has come into my mouth. I guess this is the body’s way of telling me that I am making the right decision; the taste wouldn’t be worth it. I am making the conscious decision to be loving to myself today by listening to what my body needs and not what my mind wants and I am very grateful to myself for this.

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